A study released Sunday conducted by the American Institute for Higher Learning has concluded that plagiarism is both “easy” and “super fun.”
“As it turns out plagiarism is just way easier than writing a whole paper,” said Dr. Heather Weiss, who was chief architect of the comprehensive survey of nearly 3,000 students. According to Weiss, nearly all students reported having “difficulties” with developing arguments of their own and that nine out of ten students reported being able to “just find that shit online.” Despite years of accepted thought that students enjoyed and benefited from having original ideas, the scientific community has now shifted to accept that academic dishonesty is just way cooler. “That was before we asked students,” said Weiss, “now we know that copying and pasting the ideas of more qualified, hardworking scholars leads not only to less time spent writing, but much better papers as well.”
“I love it,” said Mark Andrews, a sophomore at UNC who just recently plagiarized a 20 page article about the Civil War from a highly respected historical journal. “It wasn’t even hard,” said Andrews, “I just googled ‘Civil War’ and there it was.” Andrews, like the thousands of other students interviewed in the study has found that plagiarism fits his lifestyle much more effectively than having to think through his own ideas and write them out in the form of an argument. “It took me like ten seconds,” said Andrew, which is a vast improvement from the many hours it would have taken him to come up with an opinion.